Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Owed to Lennon

Owed to Lennon...

Forget the embarrassment of being sentimental. I'm on 'spring break' right now from law school and finally got to go to the beach with Rachel and the boys. Lennon couldn't believe that I wasn't going to school. He wouldn't leave my side and was so excited that I was actually going to do something. He showed me everything I had been missing--catching waves with arm floaters, chasing birds, running in the ocean until you trip and (his favorite) surfing on Milk Toast's body board. It's crazy how a 3 year old with no thought or social skill can make you feel like the most important person in the world. Everything you do or say is perfect to them. I know that Lennon trusts me on a level that I have never experienced. If I told him to jump out of a moving car--he would. I'm convinced that not many people will experience a love like our love. I would bleed myself dry for this kid. I'm old enough now to realize that I am living in a moment that I will miss. I realized today, for the first time, that I will lose the Lennon I have right now. I feel like I'm losing certain parts of him that I really enjoy, without either of us having a choice. Strange to have a gift that is so amazing but fleeting. I have to appreciate this phase and write it down while I'm feeling it, in hopes that it will bring the feeling back when I need it. I hope that there are even better things to come that I haven't experienced yet. Thanks for making me feel love, fear and mostly hope.

8 comments:

Jamie said...

Love that B. Yup, it's true. I was just thinking that it seems like just yesterday I brought Tyson home from the hospital and now he's 11. ELEVEN>>>>with an attitude. I understand how you feel. Every tiny moment that seems so insignificant is such a gift. Love you guys and miss you!

Rachel said...

Man b... I love this and u.

Rachel said...

Man b... I love this and u.

Farrah said...

wow. well not to mention that that was very well written you lawyer you! but isnt it crazy when those life epiphany's hit ya like a bulldozer. and the love for a child is like none other...you nailed it b. love you brother.

r+s+a laney said...

agree with richie. tear.

The Branham Family said...

there should be a warning for pregnant ladies not to read this.. I just cried for an hour.. jk but seriously.. love y'all!

Bartholomew said...

I love this blog Holden

annie and jared said...

this post is so cute b. I feel every single thing you wrote, and completely agree with you. I just got all teary. miss you guys!

precious

precious